Basic Persuasion

May 19, 2005

Almost everything you do involves persuading someone to do something for you.
Three elements persuade: facts, references, and emotion. A good argument uses all three. Let'€™s try to persuade your husband to buy you that diamond:

"Your mother really likes the lusty sparkling. We all know that diamonds are forever. They really have not depreciated in the past 50 years. And honey, don't you love me?&quot

An authoritative reference, solid data, and a shameless play on emotion. The lady got the diamond.

Persuading someone at work is harder. After all, we are all highly trained professionals that are not easily influenced. But the basic elements are the same. You prepare data, you socialize the idea, and you nail it down with a punch of emotion. Among these three elements, data is the weakest one and emotion is always the final deciding one.

Let's try to get promoted.

• Do you have data for your performance? Is your resume convincing?
• Who will be your references? Do they matter? Are they the ones your boss listens to?
• Does he like you? Can he communicate with you? Does he trust you?

How much time you spend polishing up your resume? Do you cultivate your references? Do your peers like you? Are you a team player?
But most importantly, can you communicate with your boss? Do you know what he thinks? Do you know how he decides? Do you know him as a person?

Try to get a proposal approved.

• You analyze the pros and cons. Collect data, organize facts, have spreadsheets that cover the walls.
• You send the presentation to the boss and wait for his approval.

Wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong!

Where are the references? You must socialize your proposal to stake-holders, influencers, thought-leaders, and whoever that counts.

How do you deliver the knock-down punch? Are you well-prepared, well-rehearsed?
There is no better way to deliver human emotion than face to face interface. Otherwise, use video-conferencing. As the last resort, use phone. Only very talented people can deliver emotions by written words. If you are one of them, you should make a living elsewhere.